Church Bulletins and Humor for your day….

Proverbs 17:22a “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine…”

Church Bulletins with Humor for your day!

Thank you Lord for humor and the ability to laugh. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

  1. The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation
    would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
  2. Announcement in a church bulletin for a national PRAYER & FASTING
    Conference: “The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer Conference
    includes meals.”
  3. The sermon this morning: “Jesus walks on the Water.” The sermon
    tonight: “Searching for Jesus.”
  4. Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please
    use the back door.
  5. “Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of
    those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your
    husbands.
  6. The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due
    to a conflict.
  7. The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the
    Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend
    this tragedy.
  8. Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
  9. Miss Charlene Mason sang “I will not pass this way again,” giving
    obvious pleasure to the congregation.
  10. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a
    nursery downstairs.
  11. Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all
    the help they can get.
  12. Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more
    transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of
    Pastor Jack’s sermons.
  13. The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir
    will sing: “Break Forth into Joy.”
  14. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24th in the
    church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
  15. A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
    Music will follow.
  16. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What Is
    Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
  17. Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of
    several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
  18. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
    recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
  19. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
    Please use large double door at the side entrance.
  20. Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy
    lunch.
  21. The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment
    and gracious hostility.
  22. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.

Proverbs 17:22a “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a
broken spirit drieth the bones.